when we can't fix things
things that are painfully wrong
pulling at all those loose strings
discordant chords to an unfinished song
maybe it's just broken me
existing in a place where I don't belong
lost in a mystically flustered world
where I just don't clearly see
you might say things
like onerous cruelty unfurled
I might do foolish things
that seem twisted and untrue
still I'm marked for destruction
I know my heart is a depressing blue
if I could see clearly in my dreams
if I could be cheery and magnificent too
maybe my soul would find a way
perhaps even let me live life as you do
if I could only feel love
maybe I'd finally want to stay
remembering how it felt
when we were together
recalling those sweet things
we both used to say
but when I feel nothing
knowing I am always alone
wishing there was something
give me one reason to try to atone
but the anxious moon
sees me feeling nothing
while the brutal sun burns me
right through my skin
right down to my bones
if I could only rise up
crawl out of my deep lonely grave
if I could grow feathers and wings
gently flutter skyward and fly far away
if my soul could somehow be saved
maybe I'd find a reason why
to tell my old self some truth
take back all my childhood lies
perhaps then I'd be moved
to think and feel again
if life only let me try
but somehow I feel unloved
when I wake from my difficult dreams
even when I dream of a peaceful white dove
when I open my eyes it so often seems
I lay there alone and just want to cry
I lay there in pain and alone
just wondering when will I die

                       * * *